Dear CostCo Patrons...

Just because you drive a SUV, work from 9-5, and have children does not excuse you from being an a-hole.  Let me explain...

I know that being at a store in which you can get 12 lbs of ground beef for $4.99 may lead you to think that shopping, let alone life, is all about you.  NEWS FLASH....we're just not that in to you.

There are a few basic rules that we all learned in kindergarten that should be followed:

1. When a line is formed, you have to wait your turn.  This is regardless of how f-ing important you think you are at the moment.
2. Parking lots have individual spaces for a reason, park your car and walk into the store like EVERYONE else!
3. Sharing is caring.  That is not only things but also politeness, simlies and remembering to wear deordorent to public places.
4. Phones should be used only in an emergency.  We don't care if you don't know which gallon of mayo to get; pick one and when it is the wrong one, go back to the store like every other husband has done for generations.
5. Don't breast feed in line; if you need to whip out a tit...do it on your own time, let me get my tub of hummus and go first.  Not everyone wants to see your crusty, bloody nips today.....

I think that covers it, see you soon at the store contributing to America's obesity.

Love,

The Rest of Us.